Power. I am powerful. I sit here and read of the things I have written over the last several years. I see the woman I was and the woman I have become and I wonder how? Is it even possible? Is this really me? Did I, me, really do all of those things? And the ultimate answer is yes. Yes. Yes! Yes I did. I am powerful. I was able to turn fear into hope, turn chaos into peace. Me. Just little old me! I truly am powerful. I had no idea I could do what I set out to do. I had no idea I would succeed, all I knew is that I had to try, and if that meant I died trying then so be it. I was already dead anyway. So yes, I found my power. I found ways to say no, ways to say yes. I found people to help and I let relationships die with people who hindered. I did. I chose to live and so I did. I chose to move on to a new life. I did. It wasn’t an accident.
Today I spoke with my therapist again. He made me say what I was hesitant to say. He made me tell him what I was thinking. “If I am so powerful as this, then others must be also?” His job is done. I am powerful and so are you. It is only a matter of recognizing it, finding it, living it. Believe it. Believe in yourself. You do have power, harness it. Take it. Allow yourself to be the powerful person that you are meant to be. It’s taken me a long time to accept this. I thought power was wrong, was somehow not appropriate. I thought that if I admitted that I had power then that meant that my ego was too big and that I would surely die and go to hell. But! But instead I learned something completely different. I learned that pretending to not being powerful, for allowing others to have power over me, was an affront to my creator. My God created me in His image. He created me to be amazing, just as he created you as well. What right do we have to play small! How dare we not live our lives to the fullest! How dare we belittle the Creator of all things! Take your power, take it! It is yours and it is your birthright. You and I deserve to be wonderful. We deserve to be amazing and smart and talented. We are worth it!
Power. Power is frightening. Power means that what happens is up to me now. Recognizing that I have the power to live my life fully means that when I do not live fully that I am relinquishing it. Knowing that the words I choose can cut someone in half or build another up, knowing that I have the ability to make or ruin a person’s day? These things are scary. What if I mess up? I will, you will. We all mess up. But if we don’t take our power back and accept it as our own then we live shallow wasted lives. Our children, our loved ones, those who cherish us… they all are watching us, copying us, waiting for us to make our move or to test the waters. They are waiting to see if we make it to see if they will even try. Why not show them? Why not let them watch us make it, let them watch us move mountains to become who we are meant to be. Let them watch, let them learn, let them grow. Our youngest will copy what we do. Do we really want to hold them back from their own power? By choosing to take hold of our own power we are showing them that it’s OK, we are giving people hope and letting them dream again.
Power? I am powerful. I am more powerful than I ever imagined. It’s scary, it’s hard, but it’s so worth it. Trust me. I am only now discovering who it is I am meant to be. Come along for the ride, for it’s a wonderful ride. Take your power back, own it. I am. Let’s do it together.
thank you for reading,